Rectum.... Damn near killed um!

Shit. Another day. Gas prices are climbing. Traffic is getting heavier. Assholes are passing me on the right so that they can gain access before the right lane ends. This of course is why I haven’t moved in five minutes. I watch the male self-absorbed phallicly-challenged prick and the ice-queen female counterpart think their time is more valuable than mine. Would they jump in front of you in the movie line? Risk physical retribution? A punch in the throat? Probably not! Wimps! I have spent many a morning and evening positioning myself to make sure these shallow assholes don’t get ahead of me. Frankly I am losing patience and fantasizing about quickly pulling my car into their lane just as the last second of avoidance has passed. This would launch their over-sized SUVs over my car and down the ditch in a fantastic ball of flames. I can see their Bojangles’ sausage and fried chicken biscuit helping to fuel the flames. How sweet it is…